pWdumaNjA-6CEEBhRoD5euxNETs When All This Actual Life Played Out: Longing for a cone of silence

18 December 2015

Longing for a cone of silence

Furnace Creek Inn
Death Valley National Park, California
21 November 2015

I managed, up until last week, to have absolutely no idea when the latest flick in the Star Wars franchise was going to be released. Obviously, I knew it existed--no one will freaking shut up about it.

I do not hate Star Wars. By that I mean, I do not hate Star Wars, the actual film, the one that started it all, the film that now has another name that I can't be bothered to remember. I did, in fact, see it in the movie theater (back when they were theaters, not shoe boxes) in 1977.

(The El Dorado, where I saw it, and years later, The Empire Strikes Back at what was probably one of the first midnight movie showings that are now completely commonplace, no longer exists. It was an awesome theater.)

By the time the Ewoks rolled around, I think I'd sort of grown out of the franchise, and I don't think I ever actually saw the whole movie, though I have seen some of it, courtesy of cable.

And those were the three promised films, though back in the late '70s, George Lucas said he would like to produce a total of nine.

Sadly, in the early 1990s or thereabouts, he started to make good on that. I've never seen the 4th film (which became the first film, but will always be referred to by me as the 4th film because actual chronology is more important to me than the franchise's chronology), and I don't know what it's called and I don't care. My children DID watch it and I was wildly offended by what I still refer to as "that giant orange frog."


SomeHOW, they (being the spouse and children) talked me into going to the theater for the fifth film (don't know what it's called; don't care), where I sat in stultifying boredom, wondering why some woman was being called a region of the brain that she didn't evidently resemble. Then I just got really bored and started thinking about something else and waited for the film to be over. I could not tell you what happened.

The sixth film came out and I refused to go the theater with the spouse and children, and went shopping instead. If you know how much I dislike shopping malls, then it's pretty clear how much I didn't want to see this film (don't know what it's called; don't care). They returned disconsolate and said it was a terrible movie.

And I think a lot of people were happy it was done.

Until today. And JJ "now able to ruin TWO franchises at once" (that's the daughter) Abrams has gotten hold of this juggernaut.

(About that comment: my family likes Star Trek, but hated the Abrams' reboot. The daughter expects she will hate the new Star Wars (don't remember what it's called; don't care). The spouse wishes to see both. I wish JJ Abrams would make another Cloverfield. I could not care less about Star Trek, but am mildly curious about Star Wars, though not enough to actually go to a theater any time in the next six months. Just sayin', JJ.)

In any event, I do not wish to hear any more about it. I do not wish to see any more dancing Storm Troopers. I wish everyone standing in lines and in theaters the very best. But please, please, no more.

Tech stuff: Taken with my iPhone6. Full disclosure: As I've frequently told the daughter, watching the opening titles and the first sequence of the original Star Wars was heady and mind-blowing. No one had ever seen anything like it. And when that spaceship passed by overhead...magic. I was captivated. It was the very first movie I went to see more than once.

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